Are you a People Pleaser?

People Pleaser Poison!!

If you just set out to be liked, you will be prepared to compromise on anything at any time - and you would achieve nothing.

-Margaret Thatcher

Are You a People Pleaser? I have been one for as long as I can remember. I am not sure when it started or why. Maybe it was my personality bent, or maybe childhood abuse. But for whatever reason it has been a thorn in my flesh. It has plagued me and crippled me for my whole life.

Recently I have been trying to figure out what it was that was my road block in life. I have thought of numerous things but nothing felt quite right. Was it fear of failure? No. Fear of criticism? Maybe, but still not quite right.

Then, yesterday my sponsor in Empower Network, Sam Crowley of Every Day is Saturday posted the above quote on his Facebook page. As soon as I read it I knew it was talking to me. I finally pinpointed what has kept me dead in the water. I am a people pleaser!!

I finally know what I have to work on and what I have to overcome. I can no longer be a people pleaser!!! 

Knowing I am a People Pleaser is Not Enough 

 

Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Willing is not enough; we must do.

~Johann Wolfgang von Goethe 

Knowing that I am a people pleaser is not enough. I must do something about it. As I have thought about it since yesterday, I have realized being a people pleaser has caused me to make bad “go along with the flow” decisions. My being a people pleaser had caused a lot of people to get hurt throughout my life.

If you want to know how sick being a people pleaser is – I went into a profession I didn’t like to please my mother. I married someone I didn’t love to please a religious leader. I have never, but once, had a back bone to stand for what I felt I wanted or needed to do.

It is Time to Break the People Pleaser Habit

"The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing."

—Walt Disney:American film producer, director, animator, entrepreneur, and philanthropist 

Being a people pleaser is going to be a hard habit to break! This is something I have been for 63 years. This feels like an addiction. But I know if I don’t break this habit I am dead in the water.

It takes 21 days to break a habit. This is a deep seeded habit. Today is April 9, 2013. For the next 21 days (the rest of the month) or longer, I am going to keep this at the front of my thinking. I am going to be conscious of the decisions I make and the things I say, and the actions I do. If I fall back into being a people pleaser, I will start the 21 days again, until I can go 21 days without slipping backward.

My desire is to have a thriving Empower Network Business. I know that being a people pleaser will destroy that goal. I can’t succeed at Empower Network or really, anything in life as long as I try to stay on neutral people pleaser ground.

Today is the 1st day of the rest of my Life

Today is the 1^st day of the rest of my life. I WILL be a person who takes a stand. I WILL be a person who says what she means and means what she says. I WILL step out of the shadows and do the actions that a non people pleaser would do. I WILL succeed!!!!

If you struggle with being a people pleaser, you are not alone. Do you want to break the habit? If so, leave me a comment and we can go through this struggle together.

If you would like to know more about the Empower Network, business opportunity I mentioned about – just click on the link below. Add your email address, watch the video and I will be getting back with you shortly. You can guarantee that when I get back with you I won’t be a people pleaser but I will tell you like it is.

CLICK HERE 

Have an awesome non people pleasing day,
Charyl aka Mom8isme    

Imagination Part 2

Imagination Part 2

Imagination is such an important part of our being. Like I said yesterday we are all born with a healthy dose of imagination but over the years so much of it is squashed. In school we learn to conform to the norm and follow all the rules and answer all the questions by rote. Anything that has to do with creativity or imagination is deemed an elective and not worthy of being considered a “real” class. Hence, we get in the habit of not thinking. When was the last time you let your imagination go wild and thought outside the box. I know for me it has been forever. I don’t even know if I can allow myself “free think”. I have been so conditioned to fit in and attempt to have the right answer. I know my creative imagination is still there but it has shrunk to the point it isn’t able to be used. Napoleon says though that “It can be revived and made alert through use”, which is good to know, that’s for sure.

One of the most basic truths in Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill is that “ideas can be transmuted into cash through the power of definite purpose, plus definite plans.” Hard work alone just isn’t enough. It would be awesome if it was but it isn’t. There are millions of people working as hard as they can every day but just barely making ends meet, if at all. Napoleon says “Riches come, if they come at all, in response to definite demands, based upon the application of definite principles, and not by chance or luck.”

So the key to making the whole thing work is to start with an idea. Once you have the creative idea and nurture and grow it until it becomes a burning passion. After you have grown that idea into a passion you need to formulate it all into a definite plan with a definite purpose. Once you have the idea, passion, plan and purpose all in logical order and down on paper you are set to implement it, and are good to go.

For me my burning passion is to have a thriving internet business involving blogging. I have wanted to make money by blogging for years. Actually my burning desire has been to be in a position to travel, take pixs and write, and the writing has been narrowed down to blogging over the last couple years. I love to travel and see new places. I love to take pictures, and if I could have had a do over in life I would have become a photographer instead of an accountant.  AND write, write, write. Am I good at writing? Who knows, but I enjoy it a lot. I have written in my journal since I was in 6th grade. Same time I started having a passion for taking pictures. Go figure. So, this is my passion. Been my passion for almost as long as I can remember, and I plan to make my passion a reality in 2013.

The cool thing is that Empower Network is a blogging platform. One of the requirements for promoting Empower Network is to blog every day. One of the goals that I have set for 2013 has been to become an excellent blogger. I want to learn everything I can about blogging. What to blog, how to blog, how to promote my blog, any and everything to do with blogging. By this time next year I plan to know, really know how to blog. And Empower Network – pays to blog and promote their site. Sounds like a plan to me.

My guess is that you probably have a dream, a passion. Probably not mine but a burning one just the same. So, if you want to make your desire a reality, then Empower Network is the tool for you. It works, so just click on the link and get started. I promise you won’t be disappointed.

Until next time. Have a fantastic day.
Charyl aka mom8isme

Faith

Faith allows things to happen. It is the power that comes from

a fearless heart. And when a fearless heart believes, miracles

happen.

 

I am still reading Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill. It is an awesome book with so many words of wisdom. Seems like I am learning something new on every page. The 3rd chapter is called Faith. So much good information.

I hadn’t thought that much about “Faith” before except in the Spiritual realm. When I think of faith I think of the scripture Hebrews 11:1 “Faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things unseen. “ I had not transferred “faith” into the everyday world. But it is true for day to day living, too. If you don’t have faith you really have nothing. Napoleon says “A mind dominated by positive emotions, becomes a favorable abode for the state of mind known as faith. A mind so dominated may, at will, give the subconscious mind instructions, which it will accept and act upon immediately."

Our subconscious mind obeys instructions at will. If we think negative thoughts our subconscious mind will think that is what we want to happen. I remember listening to Michael Clouse explain it years ago. He basically said our thoughts and words are like the captain of a ship and our subconscious mind is like the man down in the ship carrying out the instructions. The man down below doesn’t hear the words “not” or “don’t”, or anything like that. If I were to say “I don’t want to run out of money”. All he hears is “Run out of money”. And basically says “OK”. I say “I don’t want to run out of gas.” And he hears “Run out of gas”. “OK”. He just carries out the instructions. He doesn’t analyze it or think twice about it. He just makes it happen. Needless to say, we are our own worst enemies by thinking negative thoughts. THIS is why so often our worse fears come true. We literally think our way poor or sick or….. Consequently, our thoughts and words are extremely important. This is where Napoleon comes up with the Think and Grow Rich. We are what we think about. Poor or rich, sick or well, fat or thin, etc.

Needless to say, we need to continuously have positive thoughts. We need to have faith in the belief that we can succeed in whatever we are striving for. We need to, as the Bible says in 2 Corinthians 10:5, “Take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ.” We cannot have any negative, unproductive thoughts or the little guy down in our subconscious mind will have a hay day and make it happen. Scary thought. I want to only have positive productive thoughts and experiences in my life. I want to have faith in the positive.

Napoleon has a poem in his book. He doesn’t list the author, but it is so good, I can’t pass up sharing it here.

 

If you think you are beaten, you are,

If you think you dare not, you don’t.

If you like to win, but think you can’t,
It is almost certain you won’t.

If you think you’ll lose, you’re lost

For out of the world we find,

Success begins with a fellow’s will –

It’s all in the state of mind.

If you think you are outclassed, you are,

You’ve got to think high to rise,

You’ve got to be sure of yourself before

You can ever win a prize.

Life’s battles don’t always go

To the stronger or faster man,

But soon or late the man who wins

Is the man WHO THINKS HE CAN!

 

Do you think you can? I do. I truly believe I am and will be successful. I truly believe that I have found the way to success. I truly believe Empower Network and blogging daily will be the means for me to have the desires of my heart.

I would love for you to check out Empower Network. People are being super successful and so can you. I would love to have you join me on this awesome journey. Just click on the link and check it out. You won’t be sorry.

Until next time. Be sure and think positive thoughts and have faith.

Charyl aka Mom8isme
Empower Network

SELF-CONFIDENCE FORMULA

Your chances of success in any undertaking can always be measured by your belief in yourself!!

Robert Collier

 

I was reading in Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill. Chapter 3 is entitled Faith. Faith is so important in all that we do. If we don't have "faith" we don't have anything. If we don't have faith that we can do something, there is a pretty good chance we won't be able to do it.

 

The key to having Faith in ourselves in having positive Self Confidence. As I am working on a daily basis with people in my J-O-B I have noticed that having a negative self image and lack of self confidence is everywhere. I personally want to have a positive self image and buckets of self confidence. Truth be told I probably need a good shot of self confidence. Napoleon gave an awesome formula for Self-Confidence. Since needing more self-confidence seems to affect so many people I am going to write out Napoleon's formula. Think I will try it and see what happens. You might want to give it a shot too.

 

SELF-CONFIDENCE FORMULA

 

1. I know that I have the ability to achieve the object of my Definite Purpose in life, therefore, I DEMAND of myself persistent, continuous action toward its attainment, and I here and now promise to render such action.

 

2. I realize the dominating thoughts of my mind will eventually reproduce themselves in outward, physical action, and gradually transform themselves into physical reality, therefore, I will concentrate my thoughts for 30 minutes daily, upon the task of thinking of the person I intend to become, thereby creating in my mind a clear mental picture of that person.

 

3. I know through the principle of auto-suggestion, any desire that I persistently hold in my mind will eventually seek expression through some practical means of attaining the object back of it, therefore, I will devote 10 minutes daily to demanding of myself the development of SELF-CONFIDENCE.

 

4. I have clearly written down a description of my DEFINITE CHIEF AIM in life, and I will never stop trying, until I shall have developed sufficient self-confidence for its attainment.

 

5. I fully realize that no wealth or position can long endure, unless built upon truth and justice, therefore, I will engage in no transaction which does not benefit all whom it affects. I will succeed by attracting to myself the forces I wish to use, and the cooperation of other people. I will induce others to serve me, because of my willingness to serve others. I will eliminate hatred, envy, jealousy, selfishness, and cynicism, by developing love for all humanity, because I know that a negative attitude towards others can never bring me success. I will cause others to believe in me, because I will believe in them and in myself.

 

I will sign my name to this formula, commit it to memory, and repeat it aloud once a day, with full FAITH that it will gradually influence my THOUGHTS and ACTIONS so that I will become a self-reliant, and successful person.

 

So, do you think this will help? I sure do. This is something I plan to commit to now. I want to be successful. I want my Definite Chief Aim in Life to be a reality. I am so excited to be involved with Empower Network. Empower Network is my ticket to success and to the fulfillment of my Burning Desire. Success is just around the corner.

 

Are you looking for success? Do you have a Burning Desire you wish to fulfill? Empower Network just might be your ticket to success too. Why don't you try it? Just check it out. You won't be sorry.

 

Until next time,

Charyl aka mom8isme

EMPOWER NETWORK

Desire

Desire is the starting point of all achievement, not a hope, not a wish, but a keen pulsating desire which transcends everything.

Napoleon Hill

Last night I read Chapter 2 of Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill. Chapter 2 is titled Desire. Napoleon says “Desire is the starting point of all achievement”. If a person does not have a burning desire they won’t stay the course.

I think, for me, in the past, I had more of a wishing type hope that I would succeed. I never really thought I would. Never truly believed I would. Although I loved some of the products I sold in other network marketing companies, I never could see myself successful. I could never see myself up on stage being one of the success stories. I have enjoyed J-O-Bs but I don’t think I have had a “burning desire”. Now I do!!! I have a burning desire to make this adventure with Empower Network succeed. I have a burning desire to get my life back. Yes, I want to retire from my job. Yes, I want to visit my kids and grandkids. Yes, I want to wake up in the morning and have choices. Bur I have to admit – my burning desire is to have the financial freedom to make those things a reality.
 

Last night when I was reading it was talking about burning your bridges so you couldn’t retreat. Napoleon said “Every person who wins in any undertaking must be willing to cut all sources of retreat. Only by doing so can one be sure of maintaining that state of mind known as a burning desire to win - essential to success.” This is what I want. I want to burn my bridges so I have to win. I don’t want to give myself an option. I don’t want an escape plan or a Plan B. It is Plan A – Empower Network – or nothing. I will make it work.

I would love to have you along for the ride. Wouldn’t it be awesome to have us both standing there looking back and seeing the path to success that we took. Looking back and seeing that the burning desire we both had carried us through.

If that is a journey you would like to take, click on the button and start your own adventure toward having your hopes, dreams and burning desire come true. Let’s enjoy the ride together.

Until next time, have a fantastic day.
Charyl aka mom8isme
Click Here!!

Education is the KEY

"Education is what remains after one has forgotten everything he learned in school"
Albert Einstein

I saw this quote today and got to thinking about education. I graduated from high school and then college years ago. My “formal” education was over at that point. For a while my learning stopped. OK, I learned things here and there. Who can help but learn some things when you have as many kids as I do. BUT, I wouldn’t consider it a type of learning that made me a better person or improved who I was. That is, until I got involved in network marketing. The 1st couple companies I got involved with – I totally sucked at. But they did encourage learning. Learning from some of the pros. I read books and listened to messages from people like Zig Ziglar, Brian Tracy, Michael Clouse and Chris Widener. I look back and realize that because of that “learning”, I am no longer the person I was before. I have grown and matured in ways I never would have without that form of learning. This has been a practice I have continued and totally benefited from.

Since getting involved with Empower Network, they have also encouraged reading daily. It is one of the 8 core commitments. Core Commitment #7: Read Daily “Leaders Are Readers”. Not something that will be hard because I have been pre-conditioned to do it.

Today I started reading Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill again for the 3rd or 4th time. This book always has something awesome to learn from it. Chapter 1 – Thoughts are Things really brought back how important my thought life is. My thoughts are so powerful they will either make or break me. If I truly believe 100% within my soul that I will succeed at something, and I don’t waver, my subconscious will find a way to make it happen. The key is to have a definite major purpose, a coveted goal, a burning desire, a passion. Napoleon said “I had learned, from years of experience with men, that when a man really desires a thing so deeply that he is willing to stake his entire future on a single turn of the wheel in order to get it, he is sure to win.” Consequently, I need to have a definite major purpose. I need to have something that I want so badly that I can taste it. For me, my burning desire is to have the financial freedom so I can travel, take pictures and write. I want the freedom to be able to do what I want to do. For the 1st time in a long time I feel the hope that my freedom is right around the corner. With Empower Network I know it will happen. My goal is to retire from my J-O-B on or before my next birthday. Will I make it happen? You bet I will.

Do you have a dream? A goal? A burning desire? A passion? Maybe, just maybe Empower Network is your ticket to fulfilling that dream. Napoleon said in his book, “Psychologists have correctly said that “when one is truly ready for a thing, it puts in its appearance.”

Do you think maybe it just has???

Check out my Empower Network site and see what you think.

Until next time,
Charyl
“mom8isme”

Who is Mom8isme?

So, who am I?  Decided you needed to know who you are reading about.  My name is Charyl Hann Armstrong.  I was born and grew up in San Diego, CA.  Graduated from San Diego High School in 1967.  See, I am close to retirement age.  It will be here before I know it.  Tho I am really planning on retiring from my J-O-B as soon as possible.  Now that I have started Empower Network I feel that is a real possibility.

After high school I attended San Diego State University, earning my BA in Accounting.  Passed the CPA exam and worked accounting jobs until I became a full time stay at home mom.

This is where the Mom 8 comes in.  Over the years I became Mom to 8 kids, 4 by birth and 4 by adoption.  After Dennis and I got married I added 4 step kids.  So really I have 12 kids ages 20 to 44.  I love being a mom.  BUT I really LOVE being a grandma.  At the moment we have 15 grandkids, ages 1 ½ to 17, and we aren’t even close to being finished. The picture above is a small fraction of the family at Thanksgiving this year.

Back to work.  I worked accounting jobs off and on over the years until I got involved in the mental health field.  Some of my adopted kids struggle with mental illness.  I got involved with NAMI (National Alliance for Mental Illness), am on the board and teach a few of their classes.  At the moment my J-O-B is in the Independent Living Field.  I am an IL Advocate for youth.  I attend a lot of IEP meetings advocating for the kids with disabilities to have all the modifications and accommodations they deserve.  It’s an OK job if a person has to work – but – I want my time back.  I want to have the freedom to do the things I want to on a daily basis.

Over the years I have been in Network Marketing.  Sold needlework, skin care and vitamins.  Nothing really jelled so quit.  Felt like I sucked at it.  I knew the model worked but just couldn’t get it to work for me.  This time everything feels different.  I finally have hope that this will work.  Good company, awesome comp plan – who can beat 100% commissions, and fantastic support.  I am going to make this work!!!

So what else would you want to know about me.  I love to travel, take pixs and write.  What better program than one that requires me to write a blog every day. 

Like I said before I love being a mom and grandma and one of the biggest reasons I want to retire from my J-O-B is so that I can be an active part in my grandkids lives.  Every day I am missing things in their lives.  Before I know it they will be grown and having families of their own.  They are only going to be young once.  Family is a huge priority for me. 

I don’t know where you are in your life right now but if you are like me and want a shot at freedom be sure to check out Empower Network.  It is what it says and people are making tons of money with it.  If you do the 8 core steps you can’t help but succeed.  Check it out – I am sure you will be impressed.

Check out Empower Network!!

Have an awesome day.

Charyl

Where am I Headed

You must know for which harbor you are headed if you are to catch the right wind to take you there.

Seneca

Such a true quote. For so much of my life I have drifted along with the tide, not knowing where I was headed or even caring where I landed. Just doing as I was told with my head in the sand like an ostrich. No more, not now not ever. I plan to figure out which harbor I want to land in and start heading that way. The other day I realized how much I want to make a difference. I don’t want my life to be a waste. I feel my God given purpose is to make people feel and do better. So, what does that look like – what does that mean? THAT folks is what I am in the process of figuring out. I will keep you posted on the journey to my harbor.

Happy sailing!!

I Want to be a Photographer

I mentioned before that my passion is to travel, take pictures and write a book. OK – I still desire to do all those but have realized that my biggest passion is to be a photographer. I have loved taking pictures since I first got a camera back in ’62. I was always the one toting a camera along on adventures with my friends, picnics, school functions, etc. I was historian for numerous things, basically I just loved taking pictures. I have wanted to take classes in photography since the early ‘70s. It's ALWAYS been a passion. Tho I have always worried that if I tried to become a photographer and take pixs of people besides my family, that it would lose the “fun” aspect. I would have to please other people besides just myself. I don’t ever want to lose the joy of taking pixs. It is one thing that truly causes me pleasure. It is the one thing that gets me excited to get up and out of bed. The days I am taking pixs are my “happy” days. Sooooo, I have decided that when I grow up I want to be a photographer. It feels good to narrow down my dream and know where I want to head. I wrote a blog a while back about my love of photography. You can read it here if you would like.

Next Tuesday I take my 1st Photoshop class at TCTC. I am VERY excited. I took a digital photography class back in Spring of ’08 and had planned to take the Photoshop one in the Fall, but life happens. This is the next step in fulfilling my dream. I will keep you posted.